A little more than a week ago I suffered a somewhat
severe bicycle accident. I have a number of facial stitches, swelling, bruises,
cuts on my arms and scalp, and a bit of a nasty wound in the groin area. It has
been a humbling experience.
I have caught myself apologizing for my appearance, even
in church services. People sorta stare, especially kids. I will say that God
seems to be healing me well, however. For this I am both glad and thankful. I
even prayed for a healing at last night’s revival service. I think God is
moving.
I was careless on the bicycle, riding without a helmet in
the rain, and with one brake already not working. Naturally, the second brake
also failed as I was sliding across leaves as I rounded a corner. I guess I was
amazingly stupid. Actually, there is no guessing to it.
What am I to learn from it all? Well, apart from no
longer being a really dumb bike rider, I need to be more aware of my surroundings
and myself at all times, period. I am not invincible.
Likely more important is that I understand just how
arrogant and idiotic I have always been about my appearance. This is coming
squarely into focus. These things are all spiritual faults, self-centered
lunacy.
Furthermore - I need to rely on God for everything, not
just my own self. I really need Him now, and I know it. My own understanding is
not always proper or properly acted upon in matters. No one’s is, especially my
own.
Sometimes it is hard to really accept Romans 8:28 that
says all things happen for the good of the called, but I am trying. I must be
honest, knowing my stupidity at the time of the accident, and say that I have
actually wondered about my real and precise beliefs.
It may be that God allowed this to change my ever-cold heart
and mind, and get me back to Him. Some of us need occasional drastic measures.
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