Mother's Day: First Mother's Day Without Mom - Jimmy Hall

Mother's Day is approaching like every other year; however, unlike every other year, my mother is not here for this one. My beloved mother died on my birthday last summer, at the exact time of my birth (decades later, of course). 

My mother was a fighter, she spent almost 4 months in hospitals and rehab before then slowly dying due to a combination of a rehab, ambulance service, and hospital system's carelessness. Yes, they murdered her.

My mother was almost completely well from her initial non-terminal illnesses, and simply had to regain use of her arms and legs (fluid retention/swelling) after laying in the hospital bed for months, when they then made a tragic mistreatment that immediately made her a vegetable for 6 weeks before she then died. (I will not go into that now.) Snap - just like that, in an instant, from vegetable to dead.

The point is, this is my first Mother's Day without mom, and as an only-child (whose dad is also dead) and without a wife or children of my own, this is not a pleasant time of year (her birthday is just before Mother's Day also). This is one of  those events I dreaded coming, although I knew it was on its way one day or year.

I vividly remember working a second job on Mother's Day night (after celebrating it with  mom) in 1998, and a sweet African-American woman co-worker saying that she sure did wish she still had her mother to talk to and eat lunch with. I knew at that moment that I would always remember her saying that when my mother one day passed away - and I DO.

I know that some unfortunate children do not have the blessing of a mother for long, and some not at all. What a tragedy. It is also a tragedy to know such love as with a caring mom for so long, and then she suddenly be gone. 

I should count it as an extra blessing that I had my mother around for so long - but, at the moment every bit of special love now feels like loss - love is a double-edged sword; the more you love, the greater the loss. I am alone, just as I somehow always knew I would be. And you know what? I have reaped what I have sown, and probably did not deserve such a wonderful mother to start with.

I, I, I,  I know.... Me, me, me....   Well, at any rate, it sure would be nice if mom and dad are able to share this Mother's Day together in God's Holy Heaven. I sure do miss them both. My parents were perfect for me and I thank God for that. As corny as it sounds, KISS YOUR MOM and or call her; one day you will wish that you still could.........